Good friends of ours are soon expecting their first born. A girl. A cute, cuddly, all dressed in pink little girl. Lucky them. Lucky baby. They are going to be fantastic parents and they don't even know it. They are both so great individually and as a couple. She is beautiful inside and out with a fiery Chilean spirit that takes no crap. She has a wicked sense of humour that can make you laugh until there are tears. He is a funny, kind and extremely hard working man who loves his wife, family and friends. Yes, they will be fantastic parents, so lucky baby indeed. We can't wait to meet her.
Recently while at the mall playground that Aiden wanted to visit while doing some shopping, I had the opportunity to sit back and observe some parenting styles of strangers. With a yummy Latte and a sleeping baby in hand I saw some sweet and some not so sweet things.
I witnessed a very angry grandmother completely over react with her young grandson when he went down the play structure the 'wrong way'. Please note there are no directional signs and kids were running up and down this thing the entire time I was there. But apparently this little boy ran down instead of up and it made granny very mad. He was grabbed by the hand and yelled at...no..screamed at for doing so. This young lad was instantly deflated. Shoulders slumped and red faced but totally compliant when being dragged away and given a time out. I should mention he was literally shoved into the chair with her finger right in his face while being punished for his 'crime'. My heart went out to him as I am sure others felt too. I saw a young woman say something to her that went ignored. She was probably telling her that it was fine to come down the play structure. I hope she also told her to chill out and speak kinder to this little boy who's playful spirit she was crushing .
I saw a young couple play with their 2 little girls, following them around patiently and lovingly. They helped their teetering toddler keep up with her older sister. It was nice to watch.
I saw a dad refuse to pick up his little boy when he toppled down the slide, landing on his head. His little arms went up to be consoled and his father refused. He clung to his dads leg who peeled him off and walked away, leaving him to cry. Not sure what hurt the little boy more, the fall or the rejection.
I saw a young mother...too young in my opinion (although that matters little)...text on her Blackberry the whole time I was there. I watched her several times as a little boy ran over excitedly to her to tell her something. Each time he was patted on the head and sent off to play again. She didn't stop to watch her boy once that I saw. Perhaps when this little boy becomes a man she will long to have these moments back again?
I saw grandparents with a newly walking little girl who didn't let her within a foot of them at any given time. She was exploring on her own and had no idea how safe she was under the watchful eye of these 2 nicely dressed people. I am sure they would have rather died than let anything happen to her. My kids are very lucky to have 6...yes that's SIX people in their lives who love them like this. Not only 2 sets of grandparents but 2 loving great aunts. Six beautiful shining stars.
Latte empty and hungry baby on the verge of waking it was time to go. My observation time had come to it's end. Yes, there are many parents who are doing exactly what I am doing. Walking blind most days when it comes to raising kids but I am sure it is all done with the best of intentions and love.
So, to our friends who are about to embark on the craziest and best adventure of their lives. You will be the best of the best. We wish you nothing but beautiful shining stars for you and your little girl.
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2 comments:
I love what you've wished for your friends, Lisa. It is so generous of you.
You have a keen eye; I see that all the time when out with my kids.
Even if I am at home (trying to blog) and my kids need me, I go. They are young but once. They need us. I couldn't shoo them away for anything. I know you are such a good mom too, that your kids are so spoiled by yours and Marc's love :)
Love you! xoxo
Really great observations! Isn't it unbelievable what we can do to children??? It's such a responsibility! What doesn't even cross our minds sometimes as busy adults can totally devastate and change a child forever. It's a heartbreaker to watch, right?
Every parent has a few not so great moments. We are human, after all.
But as a parent of 3 grown kids I would offer this advise to the grandmother or parent of those kids.
Remember that you are everything to that child. The world begins and ends with you.
No matter how busy you are, or how irritated you are at them or someone else, you affect the very person this child will become.
Good or not so good, happy or depressed, great self-esteem or self-conscious, motivated work ethic or lazy sense of entitlement, it all begins with family.
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