Time will tell

Time. It's a funny thing. One of 2 guarantees in life is that it will pass with no chance of a do-over. Once it's gone, it's gone. As much as we wish life had a pause and a rewind button, it doesn't. There are songs written about time and it has given many a poet a melancholy friendly topic, not to mention the many cliches.

Time keeps on slippin' slippin' slippin' into the future

Time heals all wounds

There is a time and a place for every purpose under heaven

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times


Case in point, it's been 3 years since I've blogged. Life has been busy with hockey practice, hockey games, dance, swimming, ringette, baseball, work, and all the other day to day stuff in between. There was always a fleeting thought that I was going to come back and start writing here again but then was quickly forgotten. Until recently.

A small but very obvious milestone happened a couple of days ago to my son. I can tell you the exact moment and what I was doing when it hit me. And that night, as I lay in bed heavy with regret, I mentally kicked myself for not writing things down, not taking more pictures and not keeping up with the blog. The sole reason I started this was that I had an outlet where I could write about my kids so I would never forget. I knew that this time would come and thought I was prepared for it but it hit me like a friggin' freight train. The onset of puberty smacked me straight in the face, ahh, ummm, ok, more like hit me in the nose and I was not ready.

I made my way to the drugstore the next morning with the intention of purchasing deodorant for my son for the first time. I had a tinge of sadness as I allowed the realization of how much his life was about to change sink into my head. Come on Lisa, you knew this day was coming. We talked about it, prepared him for it. This is not a big deal.

I stood in front of a wall of choices as my eyes scanned the options for pit stick. Gillette, Axe, Speed Stick, Dove...hmmm, wow...Dove makes deodorant for men now? Wait a second, mens deodorant? Where is the children's' deodorant? I can't buy mens deodorant, he's a child. He's my boy, my baby, my first born, I can't buy him mens deodorant!! Then, it hit me. Straight up whacked me upside the head. He's not a baby anymore. There was a rising panic in my chest followed by a funny, hiccup noise that had escaped as a sob rose in my throat. Nope, not ready for this, I thought, as I made my way out of there and to the closest bathroom. By the time I made it into a stall, I was already into the ugly cry.
I'm not ready for this....I want some time back.

When did he grow from this


To this?


But then, as time passed, sitting there in the bathroom stall, I realized how wonderful a human he is, not just a great kid, but a great human being. Kind, sweet, smart, honest, fair, loving and funny. He encompasses everything that a great man should be. He's still got a lot of growing up to do but he's on the right path and I couldn't be more proud or have more love for this young man than I do today.

If nothing else, our house will smell better.