Don't judge this book by it's cover

Anyone who knows me knows that I love to read. When I was pregnant with my first I turned all my reading attention to parenting books. I furiously gathered books that had anything to do with pregnancy and raising babies, sleeping, discipline, survival the first year…you name it, I was probably reading it. I was a walking ‘How-to-be-a-parent’ library. I was terrified of being under-prepared, so naturally, I over-prepared.

With this pregnancy, I haven’t read much of anything except maybe a few easy read fiction novels or some nutrition labels. Whenever I find myself face to face with some major 4-year-old dilemma, I often think, I’d probably handle this better if I’d just read a book on it. And then I google it and read up on how to handle it the next time. Kicking myself in the arse for the way I originally handled it.

Last night I came across an old parenting book and started skimming the pages and in an instant I became a "I am so prepared for this baby" mother to a "Holy sweet mother of God, how the hell am I going to do this" mother. All the old insecurities I felt 5 years ago came rushing back.

Would my children hate me later in life for the way I handled a temper tantrum? Or what about that time I let him/her cry it out? (Although that only lasted mere minutes). Will they end up on a psychiatrists couch as an adult because I let them sleep in the bed with us? Will they judge me forever and a day for putting them in daycare at such a young age? OMG, I thought, I am going to fail as a parent!! I may as well just throw in the towel now...

Ok...so I over reacted (surprise, surprise). Nothing beats you down & builds you back up quite like being a mom (or a dad) does. Children don't come with an instruction manual and maybe I’d be better off if I stopped looking for one.